I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Never underestimate the power of titties
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
