new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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