if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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