butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
