mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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