I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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