mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize