new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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