Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
