If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
