Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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