You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You need a sexual gate keeper
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
