Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!