the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
