You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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