sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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