apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
