strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
