there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
