Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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