That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
