Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
