What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
