I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
