I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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