Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
