You're so nebulous sometimes
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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