Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
