Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
