You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
