I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize