Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Randomize
