im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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