Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
