I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
