I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize