K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
