I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I think i got beer on your cat.
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