Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Randomize
