I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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