why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I pour the whiskey from now on
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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