I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
