new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
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