from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
