Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Randomize
