it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
