I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
