if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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