I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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