I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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