its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
