talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
